Saturday, June 24, 2017

Hey, you wanna know who's not funny?

My husband!!!
 
 
 
 
 
 
A few days ago I was discussing what I should of done for my big 30th birthday that I celebrated a couple of months ago.
 
 
 
"For my 30th birthday, I should of really got myself braces!" I told him. I've always hated my teeth, while they are straight, I do have a huge gap. I always feel like I have the smile of a third grader.
 
See:
 
 
 
"Well... you could look at the positive," he said, "at least you don't have to worry food getting stuck in your teeth."
 
 
 
 
 
"Unless it's a whole steak," he added.
 
 
 
 
 
 
So... Anybody want a FREE husband?...
 

Friday, June 23, 2017

Friday Favorites!












I'm joining Erika, Narci, and Andrea, to share our FAVORITES on Friday.  





Lots of randomness going on this week!
 
 
 
 
First up-
We brought home our piggy!
 
And if you are wondering- this is how you bring home your pig minivan style, haha!
 
 
You can meet Barbie Q, here.
 
 
But ya'll, we are SO sad! Barbie Q's fun on death row was short lived because she escaped the night we brought her home. We are still praying she comes back.
 
 
 
 
 
 
TWO-
This dude!
It's rare that this boy sits still long enough for me to squeeze  in a selfie with him!

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
THREE-
We are FINALLY getting to celebrate this cutie turning 2 this weekend, and tropical storm or not, WE ARE CELEBRATING!
 
 
 
 Hallelujah!
 
 
 
 
Here are some pictures from his actual  birthday. We celebrated with is favorite food: spaghetti, cake, and the grandparents! And of course GIFTS!
 
 
 


  
I'm TWO!
 





FOUR:
We received our FIRST letter from the child we sponsored in Africa, Adama! The kids are excited to get to learn about him and write him letters!
 
If you are interested in learning more about sponsoring a child click here!
 

 
 
 
 
 
 
FIVE:
We celebrated this girl's LAST swim meet of the season at Divisionals this past Saturday. She did awesome and we are so proud of her!!!
 
 
 
And how CUTE is this picture of all my littles carrying their chairs! Little Mr. Ryker insisted!
#SOCUTE!

 
 
Then we headed across town to my SIL's to celebrate the Dads with them....
 
 And to celebrate their new pool!
I was going to let the kids spend a few days there this Summer, but I've changed my mind.
 
I think I am just going to go by myself! HA!
 
 
Have a great weekend, ya'll!
 
 
 
 
 


Thursday, June 22, 2017

Problems with plus- size clothing...

"What's up with women's clothes these days?" I asked myself that yesterday in the women's dressing room at Catos, aloud. 




In an effort to find answers I did what any normal person would do, I took pictures and asked my co-workers. 




They didn't have a good answer for why the shirt didn't have a waist.




Or why it showed my mid-drift. 




Or why one arm hole was a size medium and the other was clearly a 2X. 




Whatever is going on, it wasn't flattering. At least not on me", I told them. And they agreed. 




Maybe you just don't know how to wear the
shirt my friend suggested.




 I can't say that I didn't try I explained. There was a mannequin that was wearing the exact same shirt that I brought into the dressing room and tried it on and I mean, it looked super cute on her.




Immediately, I felt like I was on an episode of Punk'd. There I was with one arm sliding right into the sleeve and the other was stuck midway's and starting to go numb. I wanted to walk so badly out of the dressing room and show the employees what the f was going on. 




But I couldn't. 




Nevermind the fact that I was losing blood flow to my right side, but the shirt didn't even cover my belly button! #notkidding 




Clearly someone at the Catos Clothing Factory needed to lose their job. 




And if that wasn't embarrassing enough, this morning Raigen caught me standing topless superhero style in the mirror in attempt to compare the fat on my arms. 




" Mom...", she whispered, "why are you trying to see your muscles?"




"And why are you naked?"




Before today, I used to pretend that I was an average fat girl, meaning not too tall, not too short... I thought my fat was proportioned. Keyword: "thought."





Clearly my whole life has been a lie.





 PS how do you put just your right arm on a diet?

Wednesday, June 21, 2017

Happy Father's Day, Josh.




Dear twinkle butt,

Today marks your 9th father's day. Not only did we manage to get you some pretty cool gifts this year, but because I'm super cheesy, I also whipped up this happy-fathers-day-this-is-why-my-husband-is-better-than-yours-post.



I know you're probably a bit nervous, just as your normally are when I post and you have proofed it. But, worry not, my snookums, I just wanted to take a minute to tell you just how awesome you are at this whole parenting gig and why I love you more than pretty much anything. 
(gel nails & donuts included)


Now, I realize I didn't have to do it publicly, but we all know that's pretty much how I roll. And, plus, bragging about you on the internet is super fun, so there!


Ready.


Set.


Go.





Josh, I love that you are only sometimes annoying. This is an important, you see, a lot of my friend's husbands are annoying all the time.



I also love that you only occasionally leave your dirty clothes dumped two inches from the laundry basket. And I especially love that you just occasionally forget to put the milk back in the fridge after you’ve used it. And the love that I have for your random piles of toenail clippings  on the floor...... is well,  I mean, I could go on, but this is meant to be a loving letter...



All seriousness aside....


Listen, there are times when your nonsensical ideas almost tip me over the edge. There are times when you horseplay with the kids too much, when all I need is piece in quite. There are times when you come home from work, tired and exhausted and yet, spend every single second until the sun goes down coaching one of their teams. There are times when you are the only one responsible for making sure all kids make it to their practices just so I can go to bunco, relax, or just get my much needed mustache waxed. There are times when you come home from work and still spend every hour of daylight left just practicing catch with them outside, and then you still come in and help me clean up and do bath time. There are times when you're tired and all you want is to relax and yet you still go back to work just to print me 78 pages of stuff I need that night our I'll just die.  There are times when you spend too much quality time with the kids helping them work on their Minecraft worlds, when all I want is you all to myself. Then there's every single night where you stay up with Ryker just so I can go to sleep at a decent hour. There are times when I come home and the house is cleaned. Heck, there are also times when you snore like a t-rex and  I silently question whether I should slip a pillow over your face while you are sleeping but I could never do that, because a life without you would be boring and WAY more difficult for me.



You may annoy me more than I ever thought was possible, but I want to spend every IRRITATING second with you and we are SO lucky to have you. And I can without a doubt say you are the best daddy in the whole world.





















BTW- you are better than Kinkos, Office Depot, AND Staples. 



I love you.



Love,
your wonderful wife who MADE YOU A DAD FOR CRYIN' OUT LOUD.
I BIRTHED FOUR KIDS FOR YOU. 
#NOBIGDEAL


Sunday, June 18, 2017

DIY Fire House Shirt!

I'll admit, I am a little too excited about this Walmart shirt turned fire house party shirt!



This upcoming weekend is (finally) Ryker's 2nd birthday party and I am just now getting around to making his shirt! I designed the logo and used my cricut to cut it out, along with his name for the sleeve! So easy!




He's going to look SO cute!!!


Friday, June 16, 2017

Our family is growing!!!

If you would have told me last year that in June of 2017 we would be welcoming a new addition to our family I would have said, "liar, liar, pants, on fire!"



But... She's here and we're thrilled!!!



Please join us in welcoming the newest member of the family to the Long's micro-mini Farm! Y'all (drum roll please!)




Meet Barbie Q Long!





Barbie Q is our newest permanently/temporary resident here and we are so excited!



Barbie is the second pig that we have raised (RIP Peppa!) And I'd be lying if I say we can't wait for that bacon! Y'all pigs are so smart! Right now we are currently in the middle of building Barbie's dream house but right now she's free-ranging it up in our backyard!




 Let me tell you the hardest thing about being a pig mama is choosing the perfect name! When I found out we were getting a pig I wanted her to have super cool trendy name of course! So my immediately choices were :Katy Porky, Taylor Swine, or Britney Spare-ribs!



But when I took a first look at her I immediately knew that my coworkers suggestion of Barbie - Q long was the clear choice!



I can't wait to share all of my pig adventures with you! Stay tuned!

Tuesday, June 13, 2017

A letter to Ryker on his 2nd birthday...

Ryker,

Up until 2 years ago today, I was just a basic mom tryin'a make it in this world, and then you came along and..... 



BAM! 


You turned me from mediocre-mom to a MINIVAN-MOM! I had no idea what my full potential could be. I had no idea I could be this cool. 


 There I was barely living with just a 3rd row seat and look where I'm at now... I can sit Indian-style on the floor, my seat feels like a La-Z-boy recliner, and I have CUP HOLDERS FOR DAYS. #thatminivanlife



And its all cuz of you. Thanks, bud.



But who am I kidding, this post has nothing to do with a minivan, but everything to do with you. 



I cannot believe it has been two whole years since I could hold your little body with both of my hands with your little feet close to my face and kiss your little toes. I was in love from the moment I had our first sonogram. 



You are growing up to be so strong-willed, funny, and kind. You are truly a mama's boy, though, and I love it.  Although it makes me sad that there are no more bottles, soon- to- be no more diapers, and before we know it no more toddling around or lullabies, even still you will always be my baby. I adore you and I hope you know  that I would spend every second of every day curled up snuggling you if life would allow it. I know that soon enough you'll be too "cool"  for the kisses and hugs that I smother you with every day but, that is why I do it so much now. I know that I cant keep you little no matter how hard I try. You just keep growing up, a little more each day. Truthfully I don't want you to grow up, but at the same time I know that  if you stayed a baby I would never get to see the person you are meant to be. I would have never heard the  precious words, "I yove you," or "mama's feet (sweet) baby" or, "I farted... cuse me!" so in a way I am excited for you to grow up. I am excited to see all the great things that you will do.
 



I love you my sweet boy. 



I love that you love your brother and sisters with all your heart. I know that most kids have a pretty great relationship with their siblings but you and yours have your own special connection. Your eyes light up when they enter the room and dim just a little when they're gone. They argue over who gets to sit by you and play with you first. I love to her you yell for "bubba," or "sissy" and if they're not listening its "CJ", "Gaigen",  and "RiRi." I love that we can now have conversations with you. I love hearing all the new things you learn and all your silly responses, like when I cooked meatloaf last night you took a bite, spit it out and said, "ewww mama, nassy poopoo!" I love when we are driving and you spot an 18 wheeler and you say, "cuck, big cuck!" I love when you wake up the first thing you ask for are "flick flops" and cry until you put them on. It's so cute. I love how you randomly say funny stuff like the other day when I walked in the room and you said, "cool shoes, mom." I love that you love to sing and dance. I love that you love animals, especially horses and when we ask you what a horsey says you "heehaw!" I love to play hide- n- seek with you and how you will run and hide and not move or make a peep until we find you. You are the most serious hide and seek player, ever. I love how you like us to look everywhere before we find you, especially outside. And if we dont  you will yell from your hiding spot ( which is usually beside the couch) and say, "I outside!" I love how you love "feet (sweet) tea" and you often order it for yourself at restaurants. I love how you have the BEST manners that I've ever seen in a toddler and you constantly say, "ma'am" and "please" and "thank you" and your brother and sisters love to fake sneesze just so you will yell, "bess you!" 



We just all love you a whole bunch, Ryker.




And we are so thankful God gave us you. 



Happy 2nd birthday sweet boy.





Love, Mommy











My prayer for you is that you would be strong.....that you be brave.... that you be different.... that you be kind..... and most of all, that you be a follower of Christ.






Sunday, June 11, 2017

An open letter from the future Roxie.

Dear Roxie,

Hey gorgeous!
Surprise! Its you, uh, me, actually...... future you. Yep, that's right! Here I am just hovering and typing you this letter on my iPad 23. You know, I've been thinking a lot about you lately. There are somethings you need to know, but first, because I know you're dying to know:



Yes, you did finally lose that baby weight- well, you call it "baby weight" even though you acquired it long before the babies came, try like................... 7th grade.



Your favorite show in the future is Pretty Little Liars: The Retirement Years.
I won't spoil it too much, but Ezra and Aria are GRANDPARENTS! Mischief still ensues, A is still haunting them, and it's still the BEST SHOW EVER!



Ryker DOES get potty-trained, finally! Despite you wanting to keep him little and refusing to even start the process. He also loses the pacifier (on his own) so stop worrying and ignore people when they say he's too big for it. Yes, potty training sucks. Fact. Do it anyway. Now.



You finally bit the bullet and started shaving your legs past your  knees, many, many years after you should have.



Beyoncé is President of the United States! Dance lessons are FREE and State of the Unions have never been this entertaining.




Now on to the important stuff.



What I really want you to know is ... soak it in. Soak every single bit of it in. I know you get stressed, frustrated, and exhausted. I know the kids refuse to listen, fight with each other MMA style on a regular basis, and on most days their spirit animal is clearly a wild hyena, but guess what?





In the future, you're going to miss it. 



A lot.




You know how they constantly tear your house apart? And sometimes your temper erupts and your selfishness wins, and you often feel like you've failed them?



Well, guess what? In the future, that doesn't happen anymore. The kids are grown and have moved out. They tear their own houses apart now and you don't smile near as much as you use to.
You miss it all.



You know that Mother Goose Nursery Rhyme DVD and how the kids all sing/yell those nursery rhyme songs over and over and over, off- key. Well, you are the only one singing now and it's worse.



Remember that dining room that once overflowed with toys? Dinosaurs, trucks, and legos... EVERYWHERE. Toys that would often sneak out and magically end up in every other room in the house, even the bathroom, and you would constantly step on them.


You miss it. You miss it.  You miss it.




You see, those toys are now long gone, probably boxed up somewhere reminiscing about the "good ole days" when they would venture out and under your feet. When they made you do that crazy dance when you stepped on them, or worse curse. Now that once playroom is now a dining room again and Josh bought you that gorgeous large farmhouse style table you wanted  (Okay, so that's not so bad. But the rest, the rest sucks.)



I know sometimes you feel over worked, unappreciated, and over committed. I know you get tired of repeating the phrases: "No. I'm not cooking Raman noodles for dinner!" and "its tacos! You loved tacos last week, are you even my child?!" But those phrases have been retired for years and you miss the crap out of it.



The most important thing I want you to know is that you never failed them. Your kids grow up to be pretty freakin' awesome people. (sorry I cant spoil it with all the details, watching it unfold is part of the fun) But it's important I tell you this because I want you to relax a little bit. Spend more evenings at home chasing the kids around with the tickle bug. Try to remember that you don't have to go and do everything everyone else is doing. Just love on them and continue to teach them about Jesus and how to worship.



Teach them all the important things, and especially like how to not be jerks.



Take lots and lots of pictures so that one day, you can look back and see where your grandchildren get their big ears and mischievous grins from.



Try to remember that every load of laundry, invisible owie kiss, and bedtime story, you are building something.




Listen girl, I know the days feel long, but they're not. Time will pass before you know it. Your sore feet will heal and you will have plenty of time to shave your legs when the kids are gone. Mark my words, one day you'll be sitting there, actually hovering there, and you'll be wishing for just a few minutes you could go back in time and hear one more off-key Mother Goose Nursery Rhyme song.



So, count your blessings and find joy in all things even when its hard and seems impossible.



But, more importantly,  don't forget to pray.




Pray for strength to stand firm against the pressures to commit, pray you'll be able to shut the voices out and tell you you're not doing enough, or that your kids aren't doing enough.




Pray that Jesus gives you just enough of that strength to get through the day without losing it, but not so much that you forget who that strength comes from.



Take care lady-
Future hotter, skinnier, still super cool- Roxie



P.S.
Take your purse with you in the house when you get home and watch out for hot wheels on the porch step. If I remember correctly, it'll save us both an ankle sprang. Your welcome.





I don't know what the future holds, but sometimes you just need to do something as silly as write a letter from the future to put it all back into perspective.









DIY Slime!

I don't know about your kids, but my kids are obsessed with making slime! We have tried several different recipes, so I thought I'd share our favorite!


Rilyn, the self-proclaimed "Slime Queen," has been making it non-stop since she has been on summer break. It is a great indoor activity for a rainy day!



What you will need:
* 1/2 cup of water
* 1/2 cup of glue (like Elmer’s glue)
* 1/4 cup of liquid starch (used for clothes)
* Food coloring and/or glitter (optional)
* Mixing bowl
* Mixing spoon


Directions:
Pour all of the glue into the mixing bowl (I save butter/coolwhip tubs for this!)
Pour all of the water to the mixing bowl with the glue.
Stir the glue and water together.
Add your food color or glitter (or both) now – about 6 drops should do it.
Now add the liquid starch and stir it in.
It should be nice and blobby by now. As you play with your slimy concoction, it will become more stretchy and easier to hold.
When your not using it, store it in a zip bag or you can always use the butter bowl or coolwhip tub!



Hey- Don't forget to exercise those brains this summer!
Make it an experiment and discuss how it works:
The glue is a liquid polymer. This means that the tiny molecules in the glue are in strands like a chain. When you add the liquid starch, the strands of the polymer glue hold together, giving it its slimy feel. The starch acts as a cross-linker that links all the polymer strands together.




Or, to make it a true experiment, you can also explore/invent your own recipe and answer these questions:
1. Does changing the amount of water or glue change the feel of the slime?
2. Do different glues make better slime?
3. How does changing the amount of each ingredient change how the slime turns out?
4. What happens to slime if it is stored out of a bag compared to in a bag?




Try it! I know your kids will enjoy making slime just as much as mine and bonus- its a great activity that doesn't involve the blistering Texas heat!




Friday, June 9, 2017

Friday Favoritesssssss!




 Today I'm joining Erika, Andrea, and Narci to share my FIVE Friday Favorites! 




ONE:
Chicken Cordon Bleu Casserole

I told you last week that I have been venturing out and trying new recipes and this week I'm still at it! Ya'll! Where has Chicken Cordon Bleu been all my life?! And why have I never made this? Its SO easy! I'll definitely be sharing that recipe soon!



TWO:
Nail salon time!
I don't want to freak you out and tell you when the last time I visited a nail salon was, but its been a minute! This week I squeezed in some time with one of my BF's and it was definitely a fave! Don't mind my no eye makeup self- I just got my lash extensions put back on!
I AM SO ADDICTED TO THOSE!!!!





THREE:
VBS!


My kids LOVE all things VBS and this week they have been visiting another church's program. They were SO nervous when I told them I signed them up, they have only been to our church's VBS. The nerves were gone after day one and they are having a blast!!! Especially since most of their friends are there, too!



FOUR:
LOBSTER!

THIS dinner was definitely a favorite!Our family LOVES some lobster tail! What makes this dinner even more of a favorite is Josh grocery shopped and cooked it and I DIDNT HAVE TO LIFT A FINGER!
Can we just rewind and live this day over, please!?





FIVE:

THIS song!



I LOOOOOOVE THIS SONG! I think its my favorite of all time!



Happy Friday, ya'll!




My man-child.

You guys, there are a lot of reasons why I love my husband:

His bear hugs.

His terrible jokes.

His blistering hotness.

His cute tushie.


And there are times when my love for him is immeasurable, off the charts, strong; like when he is doing the dishes or folding laundry. Or when I swipe his credit card.


But with all this good comes a price and I vowed to love all of him, embarrassing grocery store trips included.



I learned early on in our relationship that I should limit his time with me in the grocery store to; um, right at.................never.



It's terrible, yall. He is by far worse than all four of my kids put together. If hes not trying to buy EVERY single thing in the store because we "need" it, he's embarrassing me. And he finds it all quite comical.


Today my patience were just about gone as we reached the check-out in HEB, and in being a good sport with his shenanigans I jumped right in.



"Ma'am, can he get some buddy bucks, he will not quit asking me, he's driving me insane!" I asked the cashier. (Buddy Bucks are fake money the cashiers give children so they an take a spin and in return they get stickers and if you are reeeeeeally super lucky, you'll win an instant win prize!)



He cut his eyes at me and chuckled, "Oh... you got jokes, too" he mumbled.



And it was game over after that.



"Roxie, what about the merchandise you put in you purse? Ma'am, she's got like $15 dollars worth of stuff in there." he told the cashier.



Next the cashier asked if we wanted the beer in a bag to which he replied, "nah, she'll probably have all of this drank before we get home."



Ya'll... I DONT EVEN DRINK BEER. #GROSS



I quickly shot him the "you better stop it" look and for a minute I thought it worked because he then said, "I'm kidding, she doesn't even drink beer."



And my victory was short lived because the then added, "well, she can't while she's on probation anyway..."



Pleeeeeeeeeeease tell me I'm not the only one who has trouble taking their man-child in public with them!!!




 





Tuesday, June 6, 2017

Picture perfect!

The struggle for a piece of art work for our play room is over!
The blank canvas is gone. I was in search of something family related that represents the six of us to hang above the no. 6 in the playroom.



Here is a reminder of my big fat blank white canvas...







I stumbled across this little gem that my sweet Raigen drew! And it is beyond perfect!




My framing my not be great, but if there is one thing I LOVE, its my babies art work! Raigen is definitely the little artist of the bunch, but I wouldn't dare tell the rest!





I love how Rilyn and I are wearing dresses and heels and Raigen is in shorts and holding a softball and bat. LOL!



Picture perfect!

Monday, June 5, 2017

First Day of Summer Festivities! 2017



A couple of weeks ago I took the day off of work to celebrate my kids first day of summer and took the them to visit their little cousin and to the Children's Museum of Houston!




Its been a few years since we've been and I kept asking myself WHY!? They had SO much fun! There was so much to do, see, and learn about! And I was so impressed that there was something there for every age group of kids. My kids had a BLAST and did not want to leave! We stayed for hours and didn't even get a chance to see it all. I know we will be planning a lot more visits there this summer!!!




We ended the day finding out that we are getting a new baby GIRL cousin and swimming in their new pool! So fun!